constant

Consistent. Certain circumstances have tossed me into a heap of confusion. For me this turns me to the Truth. My heart hurts, my mind is disoriented and my body is plagued with issues. The only thing that keeps me focused properly is faith. Believe. One might say for me to be living up to my name - believing in the Hero.

I am not perfect, nor never will be. It's only 22 days into the new year and I've already missed 2 days of quiet times. The percentage can get smaller, but I'm kind of glad it will never be perfect because I feel like that would develop into pride and Satan would be able to attack me in that manner.

The joy that reading every morning brings is so unlike any other joy throughout the day. I pray that this burning desire will be fueled more and more each day. I pray that God will use what I'm gleaning and teach me more about Himself, His glory, and promises.

With all things in life, whether we originally perceive them as good or bad, 'All things work for the glory of God for those who love Him'-Rom 8:28. Therefore even if things may seem bad, because I trust Him and love Him, God will be glorified somehow. Even if I don't see it right away, a week from now, a month from now, sometimes it may be years from now that I will figure out what God was trying to do. I feel like I am cultivating this aspect of my life more. My responses initially may be negative, but I remind myself of the truth-that God is working through the circumstances that I may not appreciate or enjoy. (We discussed this at women's CG last week, it was interesting because everything people were saying are things I tell myself on a daily basis.)

How easily we forget! Daily, hourly, even minute reminders would help immensely. Reading through Genesis and Exodus (I'm just going straight through until the end like I did when I was a kid) I can quickly judge the Israelites and scoff at them, pridefully (sinfully) thinking, "how could they grumble and complain, wish to be back in slavery, or horde manna when God clearly has shown them sign after sign of His power?" Then I look at my own broken, sinful, shameful human existence and realize to my own dismay and sadness that I do exactly the same thing. I was the one who drove the nails into Christ's hands and feet. It was my sin that held Him there. He went through so much pain because I wasn't satisfied with what God had given me, because I wanted more, because I was jealous, because I coveted, because I judged, because I sinned.

Oh, how glad I am that the Holy Spirit entered my heart and opened my eyes. How much I rejoice that Jesus was the ultimate gift of love-for me. How could God love me? Once because He made me, and twice because He bought me-with the blood of Christ.

When I remember these things daily, other worries or anxieties that I had seem insignificant. I know that God's plan is best. I will follow where ever He leads me. Regardless of where He asks me to go, what He asks me to do, I know that He will give me grace and the talents and gifts to glorify Him through whatever task, where ever. I praise Him for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Thank You Lord for choosing me. Thank You for adding kindling to the fire, so that I yearn to know more about You. So that I have to learn more about You. That it is a desire of my own free will to read Your word and invest more time with You. I thank You that You have integrated continuous prayer in my life from a young age, where I feel as though You are my most constant friend, my best friend. I talk to You daily, throughout all my activities and life. It's more of an open-on going conversation. I know You are listening. I know You answer my prayers. My spoken and unspoken prayers. I know You will answer the longings of my heart.

-run for life